Remus dies and Sirius lives, for anon.
Winter had arrived, but Sirius wouldn’t have been able to tell if it wasn’t for the snow and the freezing breeze that brushed against his skin. He couln’t have told neither the date nor the current hour. For the simple reason that he didn’t know. It didn’t matter anyway.
He stared down at the tombstone. Many flowers were on it, each pot left by members of the order and family. among them, a single rose. It was still fresh. Sirius eyed the thin snowflakes slowly covering the flowers, his mind slowly drifting into the past.
"Ther won’t be back anytime soon," Sirius said, entering the room fresh from the battle. "Mark my words!" Sirius barked a laugh, but a groan ascaped his lips as he felt a slight pain along his jaw.
Kingsley spoke, and Sirius stilled immediately, his hand freezing on his jawline. He slowly looked up and realized that his statement didn’t make anyone laugh. The rest of the order seemed rather anxious… some of them gazed somewhere blankly, and Sirius swore he saw Tonks’ eyes glimmering. He sighed.
"I’m so sick of that tone… it’s always a bad omen. Who is it this time?" He asked, trying not to sound nervous.
Half of the order sucked in a breath, as if they hadn’t expected the question. Sirius frowned as the the line they formed tightened, leaving no gap between them. That’s only when he realized there was something behind them. Something they clearly didn’t want him to see. His eyes narrowed.
"Kingsley, who is it?" He repeated firmly.
The man opened his mouth, but nothing came out. Sirius was about to yell something when he realized something. He remained still, his eyes travelling in the room. His heartbeat began racing, but his face remained straight, ever so slightly cringed by angst.
"Where’s Remus?" He asked, looking around. He eaxamined each head that formed the line: the Weasleys, Kingsley, Tonks, Mad-Eye… He examined each one of them, as if he expected Remus’ head to miraculously pop out. but all he saw were sorrowful faces.
"Sirius, I’m truly sorry…" Molly finally spoke softly, taking a step forward.
And by breaking the line, Molly revealed a body lying behind her, covered by a long piece of white clothe. Sirius’ stared at it for a moment, and slowly his features became harsh.
"No shit, Molly!" He spat. He quickly stepped through the gap between Arthur and Kingsley, neither one of them stopping him, until he reached the body. He stared down at it. "It’s not him."
"Sirius, we tried everything… the curse caused a lot of damamage, you coudln’t have saved him…"
Sirius didn’t listen. He lifted a hand up and grasped the white piece of clothe, slowly pulling it down to reveal the face. Hair, forehead, eyebrows, eyes, nose… Sirius’ heart sank… lips… chin.
"No…" He whispered. "NO!"
A sob escaped Sirius’ lips. The grave was now covered with snow, but he couldn’t see well. His sight was blurred. He wiped his tears fiercly and knelt down, facing the tombstone.
Remus John Lupin
1960 - 1996
"Hullo, Moons." Sirius smiled. "Bit cold, isnt it? Christmas must be coming very soon…"
He leaned forwards and wiped the snow off the stone, making sure not to knock over the flower pots.
"The truth is, Remus, I don’t count time anymore. Nope! I merely let it slip through my fingers."
He stopped, looking down at the the grave as if he could see Remus through it.
"Don’t give me that look, I… I just don’t know how to cope with time anymore. I mean, I feel like i’m living the same day over and over again. I feel like I won’t stop reliving this day until you keep the promise you made me that morning. Remember, Moony? You agreed. You said you would."
Sirius had picked up the rose he had left there weeks ago as he spoke, and ran his fingers around the stem untin he reached, just below the petals… a ring. A silver ring, which appeared to be simple, but was in fact the most precious thing left to Sirius. Sirius tilted it a little and read on the inside of the ring ‘M & P’.
"You can’t just come back into my arms after years, promise me to make the the happiest man in the world and vanish… You can’t…" He said, his voice shaky.
He brought the ring to his lips and left it there, pressed againt them, as if he had wanted to leave their print on what was left of his lover.
"Why should i check the clock if I don’t have any reason left to deal with it? You were my sunrise and my sunset. You were my sunshine and my moon. You were my whole universe, Remus."
He closed his eyes, remembering how Remus’ face had finally brightened after weeks when he pulled out the ring, how they lied on their bed for an extra hour, planning on inviting Dumbledore to the wedding, buying a new house and leave 12 Grimmauld behind, get a cat, adopt a couple of babies… Remus told Sirius that he wanted to name his daughter Hope. Sirius agreed, as long as she wasn’t named after a star. And they laughed.
Then the warmth of their bed dissapeared. Sirius never rolled on Remus’ side again, leaving it just like he left it. He drank all the disgusting tea Remus had stocked. In one single day. He put on Remus’ favourite records everyday and hit replay until he fell asleep. But his lover’s scent slowly began to dissapear from their room; even the part of him that completed Sirius and filled his heat dissapeared, and soon all that left of him were memories and a ring.
Sirius took a deep breath and put the ring back on the rose, casting the usual charm to protect it.
"It will always belong to you, Moony."
He stood up, and looked down at it for a moment.
"Just like my heart."
With those words, he left. The grave remained quiet, but the morning sparrow had already started singing.
Trying to be angry at your best friend like
what do you mean it isn’t a solo? a playlist of duets and ensemble numbers we somehow manage to sing by ourselves, character voices and all
/ i. prologue - into the woods / ii. the confrontation - les miserables / iii. hello - the book of mormon / iv. who’s crazy/my psychopharmacologist and I - next to normal / v. the bitch of living - spring awakening / vi. there! right there! - legally blonde / vii. cell block tango - chicago / viii. king of new york - newsies / ix. i’ve decided to marry you - a gentleman’s guide to love and murder / x. what is this feeling? - wicked / xi. i am the one - next to normal / xii. your fault - into the woods / xiii. anything you can do - annie get your gun / xiv. la vie bohème - rent / xv. one day more - les miserables / bonus track. get back to hogwarts - starkid
Actually, I’m highly logical which allows me to look past extraneous detail and perceive clearly that which others overlook.
"Knock, knock. Mr. Criminal?"
what the fuck
People tell me I look mournful. They say, “Cheer up, Dan, it’s not that bad!” Sometimes I just look into space, which freaks people out. If I was ever required to do anything other than look haunted, I could. I’m a happy person.
this entire episode is a treasure.